I was very fortunate because my first sex club was the Oasis Aqua Lounge in Toronto, Ontario. Not only is this the cleanest sex club I have been to, but the rules and regulations are drawn out for you at the get-go. I’ll explain why these two things are so important in a moment.
Unlike most other sex clubs I’ve been to, the Oasis Aqua Lounge is not a swingers club. Of course, swinging does occur, as well there are designated nights for this specific lifestyle, but in general, it’s very open to all types of sexualities!
I’m thrilled my first club experience was so positive, because it opened me up to the idea of sex clubbing in general. The downside to this is it’s also made me very picky about other clubs I visit.
Rather than just spilling my heart out over the Oasis Aqua Lounge, below I’ve listed what I believe are the main things you should keep in mind when deciding on a sex club.
Like any business, price varies depending on the city its in, what’s included in the price, the amenities, and the type of night you’re paying for. For example, most clubs have separate prices for couples and single people. It is usually more expensive for single men, and they are only allowed to enter on designated nights. In some clubs, the door price may include one (or more) free beverage, snacks or dinner (I’ve even seen a candy buffet!), condoms and lube, use of equipment (example: whips, handcuffs), access to pool, hot tub, sauna and steam room.
2. Dress Code
What you wear will depend on the club. Some clubs require that you take all of your clothes off, while others give you the freedom of expression. In my articles to come, I will speak about the specific dress code of the clubs I visited.
Dressed up for Les Chandelles (Paris) in the new harness Master J bought me for my birthday!
Okay, this is where I’ll spill the love for the Oasis Aqua Lounge. Of course, in any club, “no means no.” Should any one disrespect your right to decline, you can report them and have them kicked out. The difference between OAL and other clubs I’ve been to is you have to ask…like…verbally. With your voice. That means you literally need to open your mouth and have a conversation if you want to touch, or if you want to watch. If this conversation doesn’t happen…you’re out! Other clubs don’t have the verbal policy. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve had people rubbing up on me, in hopes that I would just go with the flow. I will say, I’ve never had to say “no” more than once for people to back off, but, to be asked is a lot nicer than suddenly feeling a hand on your backside.
4. Cleanliness / Hygiene / Protection
I will not go near a sex club that does not take sanitation, hygiene or protection of their clientele seriously. Having gone to a club like the Oasis Aqua Lounge, where there are condoms, lube, paper towel and spray in almost every corner of the house, along with at least one employee constantly cleaning the place, I have super high standards when it comes to laying my naked ass down on anything. On the opposite end of the spectrum, I’ve been to a club where it was so dirty and unkempt (used condoms left on the mattresses, liquid, from God knows what, all over the place), I almost demanded my money back. This is a difficult one, because every club will claim they are clean. My best advice is to read the reviews OR visit the club and ask if you can do a walk-through before committing to paying the price for the evening.
5. Events / Themes
As a couple looking to play with each other (and another woman), Master J and I are very particular about which events we go to. As mentioned, most clubs have designated nights for couples. On couples’ nights, usually single women are allowed to enter. That’s what we want. Master J and I avoid events that permit entry of solo males. Why? We aren’t too keen on having a group (and yes, I mean a group) of men masturbating while watching us do our thing. Don’t get me wrong, I definitely have some exhibitionist bones in my body, but there is usually a level of creepiness that comes with the prying eyes of desperately horny men…
In addition to paying attention to designated couples/singles nights, make sure that the theme of the evening reflects your sexual interests. For example, if you aren’t part of the LGBTQ community, maybe don’t go on a night that is dedicated to them…
6. Play Time
Every club is different. Different layout, different themes, different styles, different demographic, different…everything. I’ll be going into detail about three clubs in particular this month to give you a nice, diverse look within their walls. For now, here’s a general glimpse from my experience.
Most clubs have designated areas where the magic happens. These areas tend to be called “cuddle corners.” They can be anything from a couch, to large leather beds, to dungeons. Most areas are communal; however, some clubs will have private rooms for people who want to get freaky behind closed doors. This of course is something you’ll need to research should that be your cup of tea.
Cuddle corners vary depending on the club. For example, the only area that’s off limits in the Oasis Aqua Lounge is the hot tub. I’ve been to other clubs where you have to be in, what they call, the Salon – dark rooms that are separate from the lounge and bar.
There is no saying who you’ll find at a sex club. I’ve seen people as young as 19, and as old as 70. I’ve never been to an event that has an age cap. Of course, the age limit is dependent on the law in your state/province/country. The demographics depend on the appeal of the club itself, and the area it’s in. Of course, if they advertise more to students (because, say, it’s near a university), you’ll have a younger crowd. Usually more upscale clubs, with higher entry-fees, will have a more mature demographic.
8. The Sex (not mandatory)
Yes…people will be having sex around you in a sex club.
Unless you’re in a private and locked room, don’t be surprised if it happens often and with a lot of people. People get naked, people fuck, people switch, they do it alone, they do it in groups, people make noises and people leave their juices behind. People. Have. Sex. In. Sex. Clubs. This doesn’t mean you have to, of course. Many people go because they like that kind of atmosphere, or are trying to figure out if it’s their thing. There is no pressure. That doesn’t mean people won’t approach you if they’re interested. That’s where you need to be comfortable in exercising your “no.” They have the right to ask. So yes, people have sex in sex clubs. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.
Can’t wait for the weeks to come to share my personal club experiences! Until then,
Curious about sex clubs? What else would you like to know?